Weekend Misconception

You know what, I’ve never regretted buying a laptop in May 2004 although the computer that I was using was fully functioning. With its lightweight attribute, it has become so handy to carry this thing around. It was my savior during the musical preparation time, what with I became so mobile and yet still needed to finish up few things. Without this laptop, I would need to wait until I reach home before I can employ the ever loyal Microsoft Word. Writing few articles for the Mudika KKIS’ e-bulletin was more enjoyable to be done in a café; with coffee (of course, need you ask?), few snacks, and new environment to let the inspiration free-flowing.

And now here I am, inside a rented Malaysian car, to (again) have a cross-the-country-border journey from Singapore to the neighboring Johor Bahru, Malaysia for the sake of the running of our project. Smuggling a personal laptop I am (and now I am announcing it to the entire cyber-world? What am I thinking? Smuggling and announcing do not really go together I suppose) to kill my usual boredom during the 1 hour (2.5 hours on Friday evening) trip. Though I have to bear with a disturbed screen-view (but I cannot blame the too-bright sun rays at this time of day, right?) but it is better than seeing greeneries, cars, greeneries, immigration counter, and more cars. And what with a vast selections over more-than-a-thousand songs in my MP3 list, it makes the trip more worth-going.

Recently I have a tiny thought of weekend misconception. If any of you reads a bible, it is written there that on the seventh day God takes a rest after his six days of work and has done enough. PS: It does not imply that I dutifully read the bible, but – well- I do know some of the contents (and that’s what’s more important I guess – correct me if I am wrong). Do you all notice (or is it only me?) that as time goes, there is a drift in that concept. Oh, well, some people are just not lucky enough to ought to work during weekend (including Sundays). I would like to narrow down the scope to those who work 5 days (or 5.5 days) a week and having their Sundays off.

Sundays, as can be a short form of sunny days, are destined to be bright and beautiful. Many people take it as a family day, a resting day. May be that’s why the churches choose Sundays to have their weekly masses, so that the congregation can attend in calm and fresh mind. Do you remember a song that was taught during our younger days? “This is that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it”. Yes, that song also refers to Sundays.

But nowadays, people tend to have the conception that Sundays are the time to have fun (often it includes clubbing, gossiping, luckily not for me), and to catch what you’ve been missed during weekdays. With all the five working days being packed from work to work, people are longing for some fun, some social life, some sports, some activities, may be some courses or community services and I guess you all agree that they can only squeeze them all in the 2 days weekend. At the same time we can’t forget our Godly responsibility to attend Sunday mass/services. AND, as we are still normal human being, our body needs rest, our mind and soul need rejuvenating and refreshing. Don’t forget our loved ones too. To do our work, we spend 5 days a week. But to do ALL the aforementioned things, we are only left with 2 days.

More often than not (as I have also experienced it an ample of time), the last item was neglected. I think 90% of my Sunday night I spend thinking “Oh my God, I haven’t had enough rest, I am still exhausted and yet the next Monday is already here, waving its hand and smiling broadly to welcome me to indulge in work-and-work routine.” What’s wrong actually? Do I need to let go something? Am I trapped in an unhealthy working routine which leaves me with a little time to do all those refreshing stuffs? Or do I pamper myself too much by demanding for more rest? Do I just have to continue on living like this and change the weekend mindset and decide that resting is too much a luxury for this fast-pacing world?

Hmm, what do I do during weekend? Swimming, going for a Novena Devotion (sometimes, when I have the time), going out with my dearest (only in the afternoon), attend the Saturday Sunset mass, having dinner, writing on my blogs, replying e-mails, doing some paintings (be it homework or not). And on Sundays, breakfast at TCC, painting class, lunch, going out for a while, go back to do the homework, finding some important stuffs through the net, taking care of the laundry, ironing, cleaning up. Catching up with some old friends is sometimes inserted in the agenda. With this, I hardly spend the time doing nothing at home. I only take a nap when I am sick and get a Medical Certificate (means a day-off from work, yey!). I still have 6 hours (7 at most) sleep at night. Should be enough, but sometimes I wish I can have more, at least during weekend. Oh well, reaching the manufacturing plant soon… Will continue later.

FYI, I am now already at home. I always have a pang of guilt whenever I am lazing around, because it seems to me that actually I still have an endless list of things to do. Be it reading something important and useful, searching for some information through the net (for work or others), practicing my painting, polishing my English… In short, there is really no end for learning process. And it is sometimes frustrating to think whether we have done enough or not. Are we wasting our time? Are we wasting our resources? Talents? How enough is enough? There seems to always be something after something.

One of my biggest mistakes is that I always tend to compare my glorious school days to the tiring, endless working days. I know I am not supposed to do that, as it will only torture my conscience, but I just can’t help it. In those days, I KNEW that I just needed to pull through until the exams finish, and after that the golden semester break was just around the corner where I could forget all about the strenuous subjects and projects. Whereas now, I just have no idea when it would all be over. Even when I take my leave from office, the thoughts would still haunt me. Oh-so-scary.

Well, it is just me blabbering around and complaining about things. It is not that I don’t appreciate the life that I am leading now. I am still very grateful with whatever I have and have achieved, as there are soooooo many people who are just not as lucky as I am. Am I too selfish to wish for all these?

Anyway, I am fully aware that a person has to make a choice. A person definitely can’t get anything that she/he wants. I KNOW that I must make a choice: should I change my mindset (i.e. stop demanding for more rest and start accepting the life as it is) or should I restructuring my life (i.e. change the priority and time-distribution and management completely)? Even to think about this I have been procrastinating for months….